OR: How to go #^%@ in the woods...
When it comes to enjoying the great outdoors, there's one topic that doesn't often make it into those picturesque nature photos: how to properly handle a bathroom break. While it might not be the most glamorous part of outdoor adventures, knowing how to poop in the woods is essential for practicing Leave No Trace principles and preserving the beauty of our natural landscapes.
In this guide, we'll take you through the insights from a hilarious and informative video by REI, published on January 13, 2023, titled "How to Poop in the Woods! *Update*." So, if you're planning a wilderness expedition or just curious about nature's call, read on!
Understanding Leave No Trace
Leave No Trace (LNT) is an organization that provides guidelines for outdoor ethics, focusing on minimizing our impact on the environment while enjoying outdoor activities. Central to these principles is responsible waste management, particularly when it comes to human waste. Historically, LNT guidelines recommended burying poop when possible and carrying it out in special situations. However, the biggest update in LNT principles is that they now emphasize carrying out your waste whenever possible, switching the priority with burying it only when carrying out is not feasible.
Selecting the Perfect Poop Spot
Whether you're camping in a designated area with pit toilets or in the middle of nowhere, identifying the right location for your bathroom break is crucial. Affectionately referred to as "poo palaces" by the video's presenter, designated restroom areas should always be your first choice. If you find yourself in a location without these amenities, you'll need to dig a cat hole—a hole that's six to eight inches deep and at least four inches wide.
Tools of the Trade
To make digging a cat hole easier and more efficient, using a trowel is highly recommended. While there are various options available, an ultra-lightweight collapsible trowel is ideal for the job. It may be serrated for extra functionality, ensuring a smoother digging experience.
The Bidet Revolution
A game-changer in wilderness bathroom etiquette is the introduction of the portable bidet. In the video, the presenter uses the "Happy Bottom Bidet," a simple yet effective device that directs a stream of water for cleansing. This eliminates the need for excessive toilet paper and the associated hassle of packing it out or burying it.
I use one myself--not this model, but I actually have three--one for travel, one for home, and one for work. A clean butt is important. And after "The great Toilet Paper Rush of 2020" ...
Toilet Paper Protocol
If you do use "TP" -- remember that properly managing soiled toilet paper is a key aspect of Leave No Trace ethics. You should either pack out your used toilet paper or bury it in your cat hole. If you choose the latter option, remember to cover it with soil thoroughly. When packing it out, place the used paper in two Ziploc bags, one inside the other, with the openings facing away from each other. This double-bagging method ensures no unpleasant surprises during cleanup.
Hand Hygiene Matters
Cleanliness is paramount, especially in the wilderness where access to sanitation facilities may be limited. Always carry unscented soap or hand sanitizer to clean your hands thoroughly after each bathroom break. While hand sanitizer is a convenient option, soap and water are more effective at removing germs.
The Pooping Process
Once you've selected the perfect spot, it's time for the main event. The video offers various techniques for comfortable and efficient pooping, including squatting over the hole, leaning against a tree, or even using a log as a makeshift toilet seat. The key is to minimize the distance between your posterior and the ground, reducing the risk of splatter.
Aftermath: Proper Cleanup
Cleaning yourself with the portable bidet ensures a thorough cleansing. However, it's always advisable to perform a final check to ensure you're as clean as possible before wrapping up your bathroom ritual.
Burying Your Business
For those burying their waste, it's essential to pack the loose dirt back into the hole, covering your deposit entirely. Some hikers like to mark the spot with a stick, but it's crucial to use discretion and avoid creating hazards. A well-covered hole is often the best indicator of a responsible wilderness bathroom break.
When Burying Isn't an Option
In certain environments, burying your waste may not be feasible due to rocky terrain, frozen ground, or other challenging conditions. In such cases, the video suggests lifting a heavy rock, pooping beneath it, and then replacing the rock. This method helps contain and decompose waste, minimizing its impact on the environment.
The Poop Tube and the Wag Bag
For areas where neither burying nor lifting rocks is an option, specialized solutions come to the rescue. A poop tube, usually made of PVC pipe, provides a secure container for storing your waste, which can be properly disposed of once you return home. Alternatively, a "Wag Bag" is a portable kit that includes a bag, toilet paper, a moist towelette, and deodorizing powder. It allows you to contain your waste hygienically until you can dispose of it responsibly.
Why Managing Your Poop Matters
Finally, it's important to address why responsible waste management is essential. Unlike animals, humans introduce a range of bacteria and germs into their waste due to their diet. This waste can be harmful to local wildlife if not managed correctly. While animals can scatter their waste without concern, we have the capacity to take responsibility for ours.
Another concern is for security and stealth camping and travel--if you leave your business around anywhere, it can be found by any hostile animal or people that may seek to do you harm.
In conclusion, when venturing into the great outdoors, remember to heed the principles of Leave No Trace and master the art of responsible wilderness restroom etiquette. By following these guidelines, you can minimize your environmental impact, preserve the natural beauty of our wilderness areas, and enjoy a more responsible and respectful outdoor experience.
Comments
Post a Comment